I recently had the honor and pleasure of sitting down with Dr. Jeneen Graham, our beloved Upper School Principal and soon to be Head of School. What was apparent to me from the beginning of our conversation to the end was that Dr. Graham is a Tartan through and through. Her love for our school and every single person in it runs deep. The other thing that struck me during our interview was that the lenses through which Dr. Graham sees St. Margaret’s are many, as she has worn multiple hats on this campus, from parent to Board of Trustees to Academic Dean to Upper School Principal to AP psychology teacher to parent of alumni and now, Head of School. This allows her a very unique perspective on everything that happens on our campus, and it shapes the way she leads. Given that she will soon be leading our community of Tartans, I thought it would be interesting to learn more about what she loves most about St. Margaret’s, advice she would give students, and, of course, what she is looking forward to as she steps into her new position. I hope you enjoy hearing about what I learned, and I know when you finish reading, you will feel exactly as I do; that Dr. Graham is the perfect fit to lead SMES into it’s next chapter.
Of course, the first thing I wanted to know was what Dr. Graham thinks is our school’s greatest strength. And although she seemed to have a bit of difficulty narrowing it down to just one choice, her answer was unsurprising to all of us who spend time on this campus. It is something that resonates deeply with all of us. Community. The sense of community on our campus is palpable, from the students, to the faculty and staff, to the parents. What Dr. Graham values is that our Tartan sense of community goes so much deeper than simply being a collection of people who are in the same place doing similar things. Here, people have a desire to truly know one another, to see each other, and to listen and take care of one another. As principal of the Upper School, Dr. Graham sees this regularly when teachers notice and worry about a student who seems not to be themself one week, or when a student comes to her worried about a friend.
This sense of community, she notes, does not end when students head off to college, however. She regularly hears from alumni who continue to stay connected with one another well beyond their years here, and even find ways to live close to one another to maintain their close bonds. As an example, she shared that she recently received an email from an alumnus who graduated over a decade ago, and their last sentence read, “St. Margaret’s is everything.” What a profound statement considering that they had had years of experiences: college, work, relationships outside of this school, yet there was something so critical and formative to the relationships they had developed here. Dr. Graham cares deeply about cultivating these deep relationships in our community, and she will continue to protect and elevate our connections as she moves into her next role.
Next, I thought it would be interesting to hear about Dr. Graham’s favorite day of the school year. As suspected, this was a tough one for her to narrow down, and she ultimately could only distill the list down to two finalists. Being on campus all summer can be quiet, and the energy of the first day is one of her favorites. She particularly loves the wide-eyed eagerness of faces as they arrive, and the freshness of the day, despite the heat. The sound of laughter filling the space once again and the screams as friends hug one another again make this an especially celebratory day.
On the other end of the spectrum, but just as loved, is the last day of school for the senior class. Although we all know the importance of our connections here at SMES, Dr. Graham notes that it ends up being the water we swim in. It can be easy to forget, as we go about our busy days, how special our connections are with the people around us. Only as those last moments approach, and students realize they may never see teachers and friends again, does the emotion and impact surface. As the water balloons are tossed and the countdown begins, Dr. Graham sees the seniors grasping the importance of the moment, the realization that their time on this campus is coming to a close, and their desire to keep their amazing connections strong as they move forward into their futures.
As we continued the interview, I asked Dr. Graham what her favorite St. Margaret’s memory is, and this one was surprisingly easy for her to decide. She recalls that this particular event was a surprise, which is rare, given that secrets are hard to keep from the principal! Near the end of her first year as Upper School principal, the yearbook was dedicated in convocation. Dr. Graham remembers the presenters holding up different letters of the recipients name, one by one. Despite the fact that Graham only has six letters, she said it still took a few letters before she realized they were dedicating the yearbook to her. Looking up, she then noticed her husband and sons in the audience, and even just reflecting on the moment almost brings her to tears as she talks with me. The reason she is emotional about it even to this day is because, “In that moment, I felt so seen and loved for the work that we are all doing together. There is no greater gift to me than feeling like I have had an impact on students. That is why I do this work. I want them to be happy here, to feel supported, to feel loved, to feel seen.” We do, Dr. Graham!
I next asked Dr. Graham what she thought her superpower was, and immediately saw what a humble leader she is. Dr. Graham doesn’t think of herself as having a superpower, and I think this is something that we can agree to disagree on. That being said, in the context of the work that she does at St. Margaret’s, she enjoys being able to use both sides of her person, both the heart and the mind. She is known for her love of data analysis, but that work for her lacks meaning without the ability to understand the experiences and have relationships with the humans inside those numbers and spreadsheets. Her ability to marry her keen intellect with the heart she has for truly seeing and loving the students here make her a superhero indeed.
The next question was another one for which the answer came easily: What is your favorite St. Margaret’s tradition? Although she has a plethora of options to choose from, Dr. Graham chose one that sets our school apart from others of which she has been a part. The Candle Lighting Ceremony, taking place in the chapel, which is so central to the experience here at St. Margaret’s, is her favorite. It is a unique and defining moment of the St. Margaret’s experience, and one which is so dear to Dr. Graham’s heart that she now simply puts tissues in her pocket before she attends. During the ceremony, the seniors light the candles of the junior class, passing the flame of leadership. With the stained glass windows covered, and the chapel lit by candle light alone, she can see students recognize the gravity of the moment; the seniors, at the conclusion of their journey, and the juniors, putting on the mantle of school leadership. It is, Dr. Graham feels, a moment that underscores the mission of our school to educate leaders.
As we head toward the conclusion of the interview, I have two of my favorite questions left for Dr. Graham. The first is one that I selfishly want the answer to....if you could give students one piece of advice, what would it be? Her first advice would be for students to believe in themselves. But, she also adds, something more specific that students can incorporate now would be to make a daily practice of reflecting on two to three things for which you are grateful. She recognizes that students have so much information coming at them, much of which is negative, and it can start to feel heavy. This practice from the world of positive psychology trains your brain to cut through some of the negative and see the positive, something the world needs in its future leaders. Although it can take some practice, focusing on gratitude daily changes your sense of well being and the way you see the world.
Then, before I knew it, we were down to the last question, the one I had been waiting to ask. What are you looking forward to as our next Head of School? This question immediately takes Dr. Graham back to the first day she ever stepped onto our campus in 2003, as a parent looking to find the school where she would send her eldest son. Her description of the moment stops me for a moment, “And I just remember, you know when you get that feeling, like you’ve come home?” Now, as she looks ahead to leading the school she fiercely loves, she is most excited about the opportunity to look at the entire school and continue to find ways to innovate and new ways to be the best we can possibly be within the framework of our mission and core values. She thinks about what SMES will look like in one hundred years, and she tells me, “I really believe that this institution changes lives and will therefore change the world.”
Dr. Graham also admits to being incredibly excited about the student Commons, the next chapter of our beautiful campus. Creating a space for students to gather around food, workout in the new fitness area and build connections with one another is important to her. She loves the idea of building something so amazing, then watching as life is breathed into it. She is, she tells me with a smile that lights up the room, excited about all of it.
As I leave Dr. Graham’s office, it is not only what she said during our interview that convinces me she will be an amazing Head of School, but how she made me feel. I loved hearing about Dr. Graham’s favorite memories, traditions, her advice for students and what she is looking forward to in the coming years. She is an expert in her field, respected, seasoned, and clearly more than capable. But just as importantly, she educates the hearts of her students and nurtures them with the upmost care. Despite the fact that I was interviewing her, Dr. Graham made me feel valued, seen, and loved
as part of our St. Margaret’s community. Our mission is to educate hearts and minds, and I think Dr. Graham is perfectly qualified to do just that.
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